Please, someone help me i soo stresssed out!!!!!?

When I was younger I used to be a stick figure weighing only 90 pounds in middle school but I never ate nothing but three meals a day and It was all bad food never gained weight or anything. It wasn't until 9th grade I was overweight 5'10 229 pounds I got this way because all I would eat is pizza, junk food junk food and more junk food I would literally take in 5000 calories a day eating and eating with no acttivity playing video games all day! I was addicted to it and loved to eat! Recently I have turned my life around and am at 157 pounds 6'0 but I still love to eat, and with the fear of having my body go into starvation mode I eat 5 meals a day because I don't want to get fat again, the problem is I have been eating literally the same thing for every meal for the past 2 months. I weigh every thing before I eat on a scale and I workout everyday,my calorie intake is 2100 calories a day nothing but oatmeal for breakfast nuts,fruits and veggies and fish and boneless skinless hickey , it has gotten to the point where I haven't eaten a sugary snack in 3 months and I'm afraid of going out to eat with my family and friends in fear of weight gain and additives to food that restaurants have, truth is I missed being small,which I am now once again weighing 157 at 6'0 but I also miss eating normal things but I can't stop myself from eating healthy, I have a fear that if I don't eat every 2 or three hours my body will get deprived and I will go into starvation mode and gain weight but if i eat alot i will gain weight, im currently running a 5k every morning without a rest day in fear that i will gain weight if i eat breakfast without a metabolism boost ive been having the same breakfast everyday for the past 5 months oatmeal with either blueberries strawberries or blackberries and almonds with protein powder and skim milk which comes up to 738 calories which thats ok for breakfast buit i just want to be a KID again!!!!!! eat what my dad cooks for dinner instead of having what i have go out with friends go to the movies and have popcorn and candy but i just CANT!!!!! i dont want to go back to my old overweight self more importantly and cant even swallow a food that contains added sugar without getting extreme Anxiety! even organic cereals, if it is not natural sugar i will not eat it! why cant i just eat when im hungry and and stop when im full and just maintain my weight and not worry about going into starvation mode or any other Stupid crap! i just want to be normal again!